To whom, am I singing?

Degas’s father listening to Lorenzo Pagans playing the guitar by Edgar Degas, (French 1834 – 1917) about 1869 – 1872. Image downloaded from the Museum of Fine Arts, Boston.

This week, I pondered why I sounded so dreadful singing the Sei Ariette by Giuliani, written for voice and guitar/piano. I ran through a checklist in my mind – in tune? tempi? words? Then it occurred to me. To whom, am I singing? I answered this question by imagining a hall full of hundreds of people. And, this was the problem.

Above, we see the masterpiece by Degas. We see intimacy. We see Lorenzo Pagans, a tenor, playing the guitar to Degas’s father who is listening intently.

The next day, I imagined myself, singing to one person who was listening intently. I had no need for egotistical concerns of ‘do they like my sound’ or ‘can they hear my guitar ok?’. Rather, I sang to a person who believed ‘your voice and guitar is enough’. This person had never heard 20th Century music, let alone a rock band. The world was a quieter place. This intimacy in performance demands Bel Canto technique and faith.

I recorded my attempt. I was pleasantly surprised. Giuliani’s Sei Ariette came alive. The songs were elegant. And, I was using a fraction of my voice. It was a revelation. Thanks to Degas.

Published by Deborah Wai Kapohe

I am a classical singer and guitarist. I have created a project called 'The Lilli Lehmann Project'. The project, lasting from 2020 until 2023, aims to refresh my voice and prepare me to be a singing teacher. The scope of the project is that I am studying Lilli Lehmann's singing book, bibliography, recordings and her reviews, as well as other historical vocal pedagogy. I have chosen this platform in order to blog about my discoveries, demonstrate techniques and exercises, and perform pieces of music. I have done so because I wish to be transparent. I think that if a student is prepared to learn from me then I should stand up to public scrutiny.

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